It is a truth universally acknowledged that a writer in possession of a finished manuscript must be in want of a stiff drink and a nap. I am delighted to announce that my latest Scottish romance, Highland Proposal, is finally out of my hands and with the proofreader. This leaves me with nothing to do but obsessively check my inbox for the next looming crisis.
Naturally, the universe obliged. Between dodging AI-generated scams and playing detective to discover my cat’s sudden illness was actually a self-inflicted foil-consumption incident, it’s been a week of drama. From the timeless tropes of Barbara Cartland to the mystery of why my cat thinks treat-wrappers are a food group, here is the latest from the desk of a Scottish author.
A Highland Romance Writing Update: Highland Proposal
After much revision and endless inner debate over character motivations and the classic “will they/won’t they” marry at the end of a book literally titled Highland Proposal, I have finally finished the draft. I am now awaiting its return in a much more polished form, hopefully with the commas in all the right places.
I wouldn’t struggle so much with punctuation if I wrote shorter sentences, as thriller writers often do. Perhaps the fault lies with the educational policies of 1980s Dumfries & Galloway for my grammar gaps, or the fact that I spent my time learning how to apply blurring filters to my face in photos rather than mastering the semicolon.
On a brighter note, Highland Fling (released this April) has been spotted in the wild! Seeing the paperback pictured next to Heated Rivalry in Waterstones, and sporting its own little Waitrose tag, has been a highlight of the month.
Decoding Romance: Reading Barbara Cartland and the Art of the Outline
My book group, affectionately known as The Weegie Beegies (‘weegie’ is Glasgow slang for residents of our dear city), is currently preparing for the release of Matthew Sweet’s Barbara Cartland: The Great Dictator this September.
To prepare, we are diving into the Cartland archives. With more than 700 books to her name, Cartland is a legend of the genre. I’ve bypassed the Highland titles for now and found myself seduced by The Wicked Marquis.
As a writer, I often look back at the mechanics of the genre, specifically Savannah Gilbo’s romance story outline. It breaks a novel into three acts, and my favourite part to write is always the “second plot point”, the moment where the absolute worst thing happens to the heroine. There is something perversely satisfying about kicking a main character while they are down.
Author Alerts: How to Spot AI Publishing Scams
I am currently being targeted by a rush of sophisticated scam emails. These messages claim the sender has “fallen in love” with my books, like Highland Christmas or Beautiful Biters. They often masquerade as legitimate sources like Canongate or even famous authors like Colleen Hoover.
As an indie author, I’ve learned the red flags:
- Emails coming from generic @gmail addresses (I have gmail addresses!).
- Excessive praise followed by a pitch for “platinum” promotion tiers.
- AI-generated scripts that scrape Amazon product pages to sound personal.
The reality of these “deals” is usually zilch in terms of actual sales. Stay vigilant, fellow writers!
The Cat Chronicles: A Foil-Wrapped Fright
Life at PinkGlitter Publishing isn’t all book deals and glamour. Our resident diva cat gave us a massive scare this week, refusing to eat, puking up bile and hiding away. After two vet visits and the looming threat of a £500 blood test, the culprit was revealed: a thoroughly chewed-up packet of cat sticks.
She had attempted to eat her way through the foil to get to the treats. Thankfully, the vet confirmed she will recover, though my nerves (and the carpet) may take longer to mend.
Scottish Book Recommendation: Relatively Guilty by William McIntyre
I’m rounding off this update with a guest recommendation for fans of Scottish crime fiction. My publisher, Vinci Books, is running a deal on William McIntyre’s Relatively Guilty. It is billed as a sharp, addictive legal thriller set in Scotland—perfect for fans of John Grisham or Michael Connelly.
The book is currently available for just 99p/99c on Kindle (deal runs until 5 May). If you love a story where the “baddie” gets exactly what they deserve, you can grab it here: https://www.vinci-books.com/relativelyguilty
What’s the strangest thing your pet has ever tried to eat? Let me know in the comments below!
Emma Baird is an award-winning writer, specialising in romcoms and fiction that focuses on relationships, and a type 1 diabetic. She is also the co-author of The Diabetes Diet, co-written with a doctor. Most importantly, she is the guardian of one very spoiled cat…
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Boobie (the mass murderer) brought in rabbits and pheasants as well as mice and birds. None of my other cats has been such a predator. Fortunately none of them have ever eaten non organic material. They have all been outdoor cats as my houses have all backed onto countryside and have been as safe as they ever can be for outdoor cats.
Pheasants?! That’s impressive…
Pet ownership can be/usually is an expensive proposition!
Certainly is! I’m still trying to convince myself it’s worth it!